One of my guilty pleasures is watching romantic comedies. Even though I laugh at how formulaic and predictable everything is, there is a sense of security in watching it. Unlike Game of Thrones, where certain characters will die for apparently no good reason or suddenly lose motivation, a romantic comedy always has a fixed ending. In the end, the couple that is meant to be together will be together, and we know it. You can place bets that the single girl who is moping about will end up with that hunky guy of her dreams, whether it’s played by Heath Ledger, that actor who was also in Gossip Girl, or Jacob Elordi.
I liked watching Randall Park when he was in Fresh Off The Boat, but honestly I hadn’t heard of Ali Wong until this movie. It was strange, especially since she had written for Fresh Off The Boat, a sitcom that I initially liked but stopped watching because I thought it ceased to be funny. The question was, can Asians do romantic comedy? Let’s find out.
If you have Netflix and have at least read the synopsis, you’ll know the drill. Childhood friends Sasha Tran and Marcus Kim are estranged. Sasha grows up to be a famous chef and comes back to San Francisco to open a restaurant. She meets Marcus again and they do this “Will we, won’t we” dance that pervades all romantic comedies.
Spoilers below, yada yada.
Like my editor pointed out on Twitter, there was a lot of fat shaming in the first ten minutes of the movie. The actors worry so much about gaining weight–the best friend who is lesbian, Veronica, is pregnant, and Sasha worries constantly about how she looks and talks about wearing spanx a lot in the movie. Fatphobia aside, it was a thoroughly predictable movie, and that did not mean that I did not enjoy it. Much like how junk food is bad for you, I watched it, devouring it completely, because, after all, this was fun.
Although I didn’t really like Sasha’s character, she is the embodiment of what happens when Asian parents fail to parent their kids properly. So much of her childhood neglect is excused as the problem with being an immigrant. Since her parents worked so much as a child, Sasha is left to her own devices and ends up parenting herself. She finds a mother in Marcus’ mother, Mrs Kim, and it is shown that Mrs Kim is more of a mother to her than her own mother. As a result, Sasha becomes this Type A overachiever due to her parents’ neglect, and all the symptoms of caring too much about what she looks in public to always working reflect her insecurities and self-esteem–that she is not enough and that she never will be.
During the course of the movie, it is shown that Sasha’s parents have splashed out for her cousin’s birthday party and not her. We can see that Sasha feels the envy at this but this is not explored. At the end of the movie, all of this bad parenting is excused because Sasha’s parents say that they are proud of her. This is terrible writing as it excuses characters’ bad behaviour and sweeps her lifetime of issues under the rug. Because, hey, her well-being is not important–it’s the fact that she has achieved so much and bagged Marcus that is important. The movie’s ending enables this sort of poor parenting is egregious and sells us a lie–that as long as we triumph despite our parents’ neglect and abuse is the antidote to abuse. However, this is not the case in real life.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, we have Marcus. Marcus’ parents are more supportive and are more than happy to let him pursue his dream, which is a great example of good Asian parenting. This is in contrast with how Sasha is brought up, and I like how we have two different sets of parents that show two different sets of upbringing, thereby debunking the “Tiger Mum” stereotype. Marcus’ fault lies in how he’s afraid to venture out of his comfort zone and go for what he wants, something that builds the tension between him and Sasha. I especially like how Marcus’ father encourages him to go for what he wants instead of expecting Marcus to take care of him, trashing the stereotype of how older people are weak must be taken care of. It also shows that some Asian parents do support their children and encourage them to go after their dreams, which is important.
Of course, the highlight of the movie is Keanu Reeves and his cameo. Everything about that dinner was hilarious. If there is any reason to watch the movie, it’s definitely for that scene.
Naturally, both main characters get together, even though in reality, it would take a miracle for Marcus to actually move to want to be with Sasha or for Sasha to stop doing what she’s doing in order to settle down. But hey, romantic comedies always have a happy ending. It’s their thing.
Of course, you should watch it because of how it represents Asians. You should watch it for the food and how it shaped Sasha’s childhood, which is a part of every Asian person’s psyche. And mostly, you should watch it for Keanu.
But remember, it’s a romantic comedy. It’s going to be formulaic and not terribly groundbreaking.
Official movie poster taken from IMDB.