Yesterday, my editor and I went to a certain printing company to do a press check. When we were sitting in the room, we started reading and making fun of women’s magazines.
On The Fashion & Beauty Section
Me: Why is everything the put on the spreads so expensive?
Editor: Purposely one what, just like we all
Me: Yeah, I know, but ours is a luxury magazine! But this —
A while later…
Me: All hail capitalism.
On The Swimsuit Section
Me: You need to have a really long torso to wear this swimsuit.
Editor: Yeah, and a flat tummy. You basically have to have a hot bod for this, lah.
On The Make-Up Section
Editor: They have to put back the make-up [eyeshadow] into the packaging after they spill it like that
Me: How do they do that?
Editor shrugs.
Me: I wonder who has to clean up after shooting these images.
The Dating Section
The Photo Spread Where Readers Ogle At “Eligible Bachelors”
Me: I like this section a lot. For once, men get objectified too, just like women.
Editor: Why is [insert name of relatively well-known handsome man in Asia] in here? I thought he’s married? Meh.
Me: I don’t know, I don’t really care about them.
The Feature Article About What His Social Media Replies Mean
Me: If uses emojis to talk to you it doesn’t mean he likes you! It means he just wants to use emojis!
Me: I don’t understand what this section is dedicated to completely overanalysing a dude’s social media activity. You know, if you want to know whether he likes you, just ask.
That Section Where They Ask Women What Makes Them Feel Special
Me: Wow, I really pity those women who start the answer with, “My boyfriend…”
Editor: Haha! This one is so sad! “I feel special when the food vendors give me extra rice for lunch.”
Me: Is her self-esteem really that low? This is so pathetic!
Editor: Then what about you? What would you say?
Me: Wait. I must think. I make myself feel special!
The Section Where They Ask Men About The “Girly” Things They Wanna Try
Me: Whatever is perceived as “girly” is actually a social construct —
Editor: Everything is a social construct.
Me: Yeah! And guys should be able to do whatever they want without being made fun of. This section makes me upset.
Editor: Baking? How is that girly?
Me: I dunno.
Editor: This guy wants to try nail art and have Star Wars illustrations on his nails!
Me: Yeah, Star Wars. I’d go for that.
Editor: And the surgeon wants to try flower arrangement!
Me: I think he’d be good at that, because surgeons require —
Editor: Precision?
Me: Yeah, they have to be meticulous. Poor guy, though. His friends would laugh at him if he tried that. He needs new friends.
Final Notes
Me: I feel like these magazines were written by neurotic women with no self-esteem
Me: And every time I see these spreads and models I feel like I have to keep telling myself, “I like myself the way I am. I like myself the way I am.”
Editor: I know, right?
Featured image by Jessica Mullen
Note: We do realise that there is a lot of work in putting together a magazine, but we feel like the content could be improved and be more empowering for women.
Haha. I only say, I know right ah? Hahaha. You didn’t put the one about the unique double use of a… long piece of material. 😉